I am thinking about writing a report or possibly a book in my next year of uni, regarding how personal friendships affect people who live with mental illness. I also want to focus on the role of the internet in outreaching to others in search of help, whether this is good or not, websites specifically for people who live with depression etc
I’d be really grateful if you could all fill in this questionnaire. Obviously, if not enough questions apply to you, don’t worry, but have a look through anyway. Please reply to this post with your answers. Also, if anyone has any ideas for questions I’ve missed, do let me know!
How do you classify your mental illness?
How long have you lived with it?
Are you receiving treatment for it? (therapy, medication etc)
Do you feel that your friends and family understand your illness?
Have you ever been a member of a real life non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
What was your experience of this?
If not, why not?
Have you ever been a member of an online non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
What was your experience of this?
If not, why not?
Do you feel that it is good for people who suffer from mental illness to seek out people with similar problems to help them get better? Why?
What do you think the effect of the internet has had in the role of reaching out to others?
Do you think that the internet is a good way of gaining support with your illness?
How do you classify your mental illness?
- i consider myself bipolar.
How long have you lived with it?
- for as long as i can remember.
Are you receiving treatment for it? (therapy, medication etc)
- just beginning therapy, i refuse medication.
Do you feel that your friends and family understand your illness?
- no, not at all.
Have you ever been a member of a real life non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
- yes, im a member of two at the moment, MDF The Bipolar Organisation, and Rethink.
What was your experience of this?
- I havent become more involved than membership and reading the materials they send.
Have you ever been a member of an online non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness? and What was your experience of this?
- i joined a couple of forums a while back but only occasionally read or post these days.
Do you feel that it is good for people who suffer from mental illness to seek out people with similar problems to help them get better? Why?
- its good to share info and experiences because those “yes! me too!” connections make me feel less alone and hopeless.
What do you think the effect of the internet has had in the role of reaching out to others?
- i heart the internet, but i think its not even being scratched in terms of potential, not yet.
Do you think that the internet is a good way of gaining support with your illness?
- yes, particularly for those of us who have trouble going outside or talking about things out loud. theres a lot of stigma around mental health problems that mean we self-silence, and the relative anonymity of the internet helps us speak more freely.
Do you want UK women only?
How do you classify your mental illness?
I have depression, an anxiety disorder, and am recovering from an eating disorder.
How long have you lived with it?
Depression 3 years, anxiety disorder 12 years, eating disorder 5 years.
Are you receiving treatment for it? (therapy, medication etc)
I take anti-depressants and anti-psychotics, and have informal therapy/counselling.
Do you feel that your friends and family understand your illness?
Depression – not really.
Anxiety disorder – to an extent.
Eating disorder – to an extent.
Have you ever been a member of a real life non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
No
What was your experience of this?
-
Have you ever been a member of an online non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness? and What was your experience of this?
Yes, i’ve joined multiple forums and online support groups for various mental health issues, most notably eating disorder support.
Do you feel that it is good for people who suffer from mental illness to seek out people with similar problems to help them get better? Why?
Yes, because it makes you feel less alone and you can pick up ideas as to how to deal with day-to-day problems. Reading other peoples theories of the development of their problems can also give you insight into your own, which can help to fight them.
However, i feel a sense of hopelessness develops if you only speak to those who are suffering but don’t recover.
What do you think the effect of the internet has had in the role of reaching out to others?
I think it’s made it a lot easier. The anonymity means you can share things you’d never consider sharing “in real life”, and earlier in relationships too.
From the point of view of my anxiety disorder, i find it useful not having to worry about social cues and expectations. And from the eating disorder, i like people not knowing my appearance.
Do you think that the internet is a good way of gaining support with your illness?
Yes, because it’s easier to communicate online. However if you rely too heavily on online support you can shun ‘real life’ relationships which leads to a feeling of intense loneliness (i’ve experienced this quite badly).
How do you classify your mental illness?
I have severe depression and social anxiety disorder.
How long have you lived with it?
Diagnosed for 3 years, however I suspect I’ve lived with it for more like 10.
Are you receiving treatment for it? (therapy, medication etc)
I see a psychiatrist, I’ve been on medication for the past 3 years.
Do you feel that your friends and family understand your illness?
Yes and no. I feel they do as much as they are capable of it, but I don’t think it’s ever possible for them to completely understand.
Have you ever been a member of a real life non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
No.
What was your experience of this?
N/a.
If not, why not?
I’ve been offered things like this by therapists and GPs, but when I was offered it my social anxiety was so bad that the idea made me run away screaming.
Have you ever been a member of an online non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
Not specifically but I do have a lot of online friends with similar problems.
What was your experience of this?
It makes me realise I’m not alone. This blog especially makes me see how many people feel exactly what I do.
If not, why not?
As for not being in a proper group, I guess I never looked.
Do you feel that it is good for people who suffer from mental illness to seek out people with similar problems to help them get better? Why?
Yes and no. I think you should, but you should never try to use someone else’s healing for yourself. I think that could be horribly detrimental to your treatment. However I think having the support group is incredibly important. Knowing you’re not alone is a big step to getting better.
What do you think the effect of the internet has had in the role of reaching out to others?
I think it’s enriched it and made it much more accessible, especially for those of us who have trouble meeting people IRL.
Do you think that the internet is a good way of gaining support with your illness?
Yes, see previous comments.
To hysperia: For this, no. Any country is fine.
I’m also curious as to how living with depression affects personal relationships. Is it just like living with any other disease? I have found that in my life the edges have blurred sometimes between the illness and the relationship which has made things difficult. It’s OK, no one has to talk about anything too personal if they don’t want to!
How do you classify your mental illness?
depression, ranging from mild to severe
How long have you lived with it?
diagnosed two years ago, suspect it developed in my early teens (so around ten years ago)
Are you receiving treatment for it? (therapy, medication etc)
prozac. can’t afford therapy and am waiting for referral.
Do you feel that your friends and family understand your illness?
sort of. my brother also suffers from mild depression and insomnia, so he’s alright. My grandmother is the most understanding as she doesn’t chivvy. Those of my friends that are aware don’t *understand* neccessarily, but they are *understanding* (the boyfriend also falls into this camp).
Have you ever been a member of a real life non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
no
If not, why not?
I don’t feel my condition is serious enough (crisis of confidence, if you will)
Have you ever been a member of an online non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
there’s an area of a forum i frequent that is devoted to mental illnesses, does that count?
What was your experience of this?
it’s just nice to know I’m not alone, it also gives me a space to discuss medication and how my illness affects my life without feeling judged or to ask advice about problems.
Do you feel that it is good for people who suffer from mental illness to seek out people with similar problems to help them get better? Why?
If they want to, it’s good. Apart from the “you’re not alone”, nonjudgemental support from people who can relate to what you’re going through (because they’ve gone through it) is good.
What do you think the effect of the internet has had in the role of reaching out to others?
It’s easier; there’s less pressure than meeting people face-to-face and it can be on your terms when you feel like it.
Do you think that the internet is a good way of gaining support with your illness?
it has been for me.
Is it just like living with any other disease? I’ve not lived with any other disease, but… well, I’ve had relationships founder because of my depression, which makes me leery of telling people irl (the “you’re just being lazy” guy was particularly heartbreaking) and I don’t want my relationships with people to be defined by my disease, or for people to define me by my disease (which they do sometimes, i’m “the mental one” at times)
How do you classify your mental illness?
- I classify it as “normal responses to abnormal situations, and genes! Others call it Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Major Depression”
How long have you lived with it?
- about 40 years
Are you receiving treatment for it? (therapy, medication etc)
I’ve been hospitalized several times over these years. Now I’m on anti-depressants and a supposedly non-addictive anti-anxiety drug that also happens to be an anti-psychotic in higher doses – they figure a dose of anti-pyschosis won’t hurt me!
Do you feel that your friends and family understand your illness?
- with my family it is an ongoing problem but most of them really do try, or most of the time anyway. Friends understand, some more than others. But I’ve lost friends too, for lack of understanding, sometimes my choice, sometimes not
Have you ever been a member of a real life non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
-therapy groups that likey wouldn’t use the “mental illness” label – yes, several
What was your experience of this?
-wonderful. I’ve been in groups while hospitalized and just didn’t like the experience, so I’ve never felt comfortable checking these groups on the “outside”
If not, why not?
Have you ever been a member of an online non-medical group or organization specifically for people who live with mental illness?
-I’ve joined some but never felt inclined to participate after checking threads. I like the blogs better.
What was your experience of this?
-One of the things I didn’t like was reliance on religion. I’m not into that and, though I respect people who are, I don’t want it imposed on me. It pisses me off
If not, why not?
-hmmm, I think I answered that. One more reason is, I found them either depressing or depressingly cheery
Do you feel that it is good for people who suffer from mental illness to seek out people with similar problems to help them get better? Why?
- I believe it’s good in general, to have people who can truly understand you, through their own experiences, than to be constantly under some medical microscope. “We” often have more empathy and compassion and, sometimes, that’s all that’s needed. But, more than that, we often know something about what works and what doesn’t are we’re inclined to encourage others to seek what works for them, personally, and what doesn’t. And that encourages independence, autonomy and using one’s not destroyed brain on behalf of oneself – all good things, I think.
What do you think the effect of the internet has had in the role of reaching out to others?
-I can’t speak for others, but I’ve often felt the people I’ve met on the Internet have saved my life. Like now, I’m finding certain bloggers are central to my well-being. But sometimes, maybe too much so, in that I might be using it to protect myself from the “outside” world. Balance is needed and this has actually helped me to remember that. In terms of learning, though I think we have to be wary of some sites and use our heads, Internet sources have often been valuable sources of info for me and have helped me to be more proactive on my own behalf.
Do you think that the internet is a good way of gaining support with your illness?
- yes, with the provisos I mention above.
As for your question about relationships, I could write a book. It’s difficult and complex territory. I know that people who become physically ill have problems too, but for some reason, I think mental illness can be more difficult for successfully negotiating relationship. I feel that this is a constant struggle for me and takes a lot of time and energy. People who have physical disabilities or illnesses are often told, “YOU are not your disability”. Perhaps mental illnesse makes it more difficult for others to make that distinction, and thus, maybe, more difficult for us to make the distinction. Or something.
Thanks. Great questions!